When routine gets the better of you

I for one am someone who needs excitement and adventure in life, some spontaneity so to speak, I get bored with one single thing so quickly and need new things to stimulate me. Having a 9 month old however, makes this very difficult if not impossible.

For those of you who are new here, I live in a rural area about an hour from the Botswana border, we own a few businesses in the small town Ganyesa, and I am a stay at home mom. We live 70 kilometers from the nearest town, and its a horrible town haha. So I do start to feel a bit isolated most days.

Looking after my baby girl is a blessing don’t get me wrong, but I feel like I am not doing anything some days, when in reality; I run after her crawling little body all day, feed her, play with her, cook,clean and try to get some time for myself, she wakes about 3 times a night, and we all know weekends are not what they used to be before we had children! Haha.

Its easy for stay at home moms to feel like they are not adding to anything, they don’t have a job and don’t feel like they are accomplishing anything really. When in reality, you have the most important job of all; raising a child that will be kind and compassionate to others, so that they can go out into the world knowing that they can be all they want to be, with you cheering them on with every step they take. Its A VERY IMPORTANT JOB !

Its so tiring to do this every day all day, and then I think of the moms who work, come home after a long day and still have to get up at night for their babies, the point is we all have struggles and hard days with our children, or, with just being a mother in general. Its important to remind ourselves that life is full of phases, the sleepless night, the fighting with your husband, the snotty noses; they all end, and we get to see them grow up. Is that not amazing ?

I hope there is someone out there that needs to hear this; take everything in stride, have your bad days, be down, and the next day get up and pit a smile on your face and do it all over again- because one day you will miss it !

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Traveling With an Infant 101

We recently flew to Perth with out then 7 month old baby girl. I was so stressed about the flight because I did not know what to expect.

Our experience however was a little bit all over the place; we flew with South African Airways which I swore I would never do again , and it was a balls up from start to finish !

We were told to book a bassinet for our baby girl , which we did , phoned three times to confirm it as I was so stressed about the flight. They assured me that it was all good. Long story short – we got on the plane and there was no bassinet . We ended up with two empty seats between us (thank goodness) and she slept there the flight , which went okay , she woke up a few times and we tried to give her bottle for take off and landing for her ears. All in all it went okay , we were exhausted but our baby didn’t scream the whole way, which was a win for me! πŸ€£πŸ‘ŒπŸ»

The flight back was even worse, we ended up with no bassinet as they give them to the smaller babies first (which no one even told me) she ended up having to sleep on our laps, now my baby has never been one to cuddle or sleep on me or even sleep in a sling ! It was CHAOS ! But somehow we survived the whole process and ended up living to tell the tale.

This is maybe not what every mom out there wants to hear but my advice is to wing it – it sounds silly but every baby is so different and if it is your first time flying you have no idea how your baby will react or sleep on the plane. Prepare to sleep very little and just get through it , who knows, your baby might surprise you.

Jetlag

Jetlag on the other hand is a whole new ball game. Some say that you should start getting your baby on the new time zone by slowly adjusting their routine until they are used to it, this however is crazy to me haha as that would mean I also have to be on that time zone ! But once you do that then at least you can enjoy your holiday once you arrive without having to deal with jetlag.

To us, honestly, waiting it out was the best option, she took about 4-5 days and we were all back to normal again, although a rough few days, she slowly got back onto the right time zone without having to force her to sleep or waking her up when she is not supposed to sleep.

So don’t panic, this too shall pass and it is so worth it traveling overseas with your baby . Take a deep breath and just do it, don’t overthink it. You can do it πŸ‘ŒπŸ»

Safe travels everyone ✈️

To the mom who craves control

This post is very personal to me,and something about myself that I never knew.

The Control Freak

I somehow, NEED control , in every situation in my life, in any way that I can. Without realizing it, it has taken all the fun out of everything, I somehow think that if I can anticipate everything and be prepared for it, that I would be able to handle it better, even as I am typing this, I realize how silly that sounds, but still very real.

I feel that I cant go on “unplanned” excursions because my baby is in a routine (and so am I for that matter) and it was not on my to do list, so I cant go. Before Paige was born I was quite spontaneous, loved the unexpected and thrived under pressure. Motherhood has somehow changed all of this, I have turned into someone who cant go out at night because I don’t want to risk a screaming session in a restaurant – for the fear of someone thinking I am not a good mother.

Red Flags

Now, with my psychology background I can tell you that everythingI just wrote raises sooo many red flags.

  • Firstly, isolating yourself from social events and friends is so unhealthy, and it sets an example for your children as they grow up. My baby girl is so happy when we are out and about, she takes so much in and just enjoys looking around and staring and smiling at the people.
  • Secondly; setting this “paranoid” vibe for my baby just creates so many issues later on in life for her, I basically will be teaching her to be careful, with everything, to not be bold, brave and adventurous – like I used to be.

Learning to “Breathe”

At the end of the day, you simply can not control every situation life throws at you, sometimes you just have to let go a little bit and trust that everything will work out the way it was supposed to.

Babies are much more resilient than we give them credit for; the moment I stopped and started living a little again, she adapted so nicely, no screaming, and even though she struggles a little bit if she is out of routine, she so enjoys doing something different every now and then. ( I still believe in routine don’t get me wrong, and my baby girl is a bit older now).

We need to realize that our babies will cry, they will eventually throw that supermarket tantrum we have been fearing all our lives, they will get sick, people will judge your parenting, your baby will be unhappy sometimes and that does not mean that you failed, it simply means that life does not always go our way, and thats okay. (Yes that rhymed)

The moment we learn to breathe and take things in stride, life automatically becomes easier, we look at life differently and see opportunities we never would have. It just opens up a whole new world, one I am excited to explore !

Just keep at it, changing the way you live life takes time, constant reminding and a whole lot of patience with yourself.

Being a Mother is Like a Roller Coaster Ride

I am a first time mom , so that in itself already tells you that I am a bit all over the place , with well everything 🀣

But what gets to me is the fact that I feel like as soon as I figure the one thing out , the next thing hits me … and I have no clue what to do again.

Motherhood right !?

It is like she is just making sure I am still paying attention to her .

We just finished the most intense two weeks with a sleep consultant and guess what ?! Now we are teething πŸ™ˆ

Its like the universe is out to get me , we spent the longest time getting her to self soother and to sleep in her own bed , it was great she did so well ! And last night ? I ended up sleeping in her room with her in my arms , the poor baby ! Its horrible seeing your child in pain and so unhappy , I am just so glad they don’t remember any of this !

So here we are , all routine out the window just trying to get through the day and praying that a tooth pops out VERY soon !

For all the mothers out there going through teething on zero sleep …. SALUTE

Angelique

Routine | Story of my Life

Babies LOVE routine !

Before I had Paige , I also used to like and even crave some sort of structure in my life and more specifically, in my daily routine !

Somehow , now having a baby , I struggle to get into a day routine with her , I try my best , but life , or my life , is just not always as predictable as we would like it to be !

I would time her first nap for the day and have the whole day planned out , and then boom , its noon and she hasn’t slept yet and I don’t know what happened to half of my day .

See , we live and work in a set up that allows for so many distractions and people in and out our house and running to the lodge quickly or answering a phone because someone else is busy , it seems like small deeds , but when you look at your watch again you missed the “nap window” and have now entered a very dangerous area known as over tiredness and over stimulation πŸ™ˆπŸ‘€ It’s CHAOS !

And even though I know this , somehow it always still creeps up on me !

So , as I am writing this , I am sitting in my baby’s room waiting for her to fall asleep in her cot , and right on time too ! (Yay me)

So heres to having more of a routine !

Angelique

Alone Time | Some Self Reflection

I am someone who loves my alone time , I love to think , to reflect , to pray on things.

I lived alone for 7 years before I moved in with my husband , and even though I thought then that I miss my alone time , nothing prepared me for when I had my baby girl .

Now however, I am pretty sure she KNOWS when I sit down with a cup of tea , she just does ! Haha between her , work and my husband , there is just NO time for me … we don’t live near a town , so day care or nanny is out of the question until she goes to school or we move !

Although I love her to bits , I wish I could see other adults , or go for a coffee ! (For those of you who don’t know my situation , please read the first blog – babysmoo)

I don’t know how I will cope having two … πŸ™ˆπŸ˜‚

Angelique

Sleeping Through |The Myth The Legend

What is sleeping through ?

Well I still don’t know haha

I hear of moms brag about it from like 2 or 3 months old , at this stage I am quite convinced that my baby girl will never sleep through πŸ™ˆπŸ‘€

She is 4 months old and going through sleep regression , so she is literally sleeping less every day ! Our days consist of 3-4 30 minute naps and our nights she wakes up about every 3 hours , shes just fussy at night time , no matter what I do .

I have accepted this as a norm at this point haha , and have reverted to a giggly state due to tiredness ….

Here’s hoping (and praying) that the night comes soon and I can also brag about it 🀣

πŸ’€πŸ’€πŸ’€

Angelique