Why having a baby is such hard work

I know we hear it a lot from moms out there – “babies are hard work” !

Well they were right ! ๐Ÿ™ˆ Being a first time mom you don’t really realize how much of your time a child would take , and its not just the attention (which to me is the best part) but your other chores.

My whole day revolves around getting my baby to nap and eat at the right time ! Routine in this matter sucks ha ha it leaves no room for spontaneity or unplanned events .

In between these naps (which are sometimes only half an hour) I need to get to work (luckily we live on the same property as our lodge) and wash and make myself presentable and cook breakfast and dinner and make food for my baby and wash and sterilize bottles and and and and … there just never seem to be enough hours in the day to get to Everything!

That whole thing about “sleep when the baby sleeps” only works when you have a newborn, this type of sympathy disappears very quickly as your baby gets older and you become less emotional (admit it, we were all a wreck those first few days at home).

At the end of the day , you just got to keep on keeping on, there is no down time, nor do you get to quit because you do not feel well or you are having a bad day, motherhood builds character like no other situation in life, you learn selflessness in its purest form, and a type of love that no words can describe.

What an honor to be called mama !

Angelique

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Insecurities – We All Have Baggage

I know we all think that we have recovered from our past , and learned from all the things that we went through as children or even in our twenties , and we always swear that we would never transfer those issues into our marriages or onto our children .

The fact of the matter is , that although we don’t necessarily make the same mistakes as our parents did with us , we still tend to take that baggage into parenthood and our relationships with us.

In my experience I have issues left over from my parent’s divorce and my parents in general , and off course I don’t want my child to go through that disappointment and want to be there for my child no matter what is going on with me personally , I want her to know that she is loved at all times, and that she has a person in any situation- me ! ๐Ÿ’œ

Unfortunately, I tend to now take this too far , I am so sensitive toward other peoples comments about how I am raising my child , it immediately feels like they are attacking me , and judging me as a mother .

I constantly doubt myself because I am trying so hard to be this perfect mother and to do thing differently with her.

Insecurities start to form this way , and we put them on other people subconsciously, we don’t mean to , but we tend to blame other for past issues.

What is amazing is that we have the power to stop this cycle and break it , to start new and love forward !

Here’s to the future , and to being better and learning and growing with every step we take.

Angelique

Sleeping Consultant

We decided to get a sleeping consultant about a week ago (I did not even know this was a thing) and we have been doing this thing for 5 days now .

Let me just start by saying that it has nothing to do with letting your baby cry it out or any of those things , they analyze your baby’s world and how you do things , and tell you what they think you should do differently in order for everyone to have more sleep.

The past 4 days have been the hardest , I have cried so many times , I lost count , the reason for this being so difficult is that we changed our baby’s routine , which every mother knows is chaos !!

Seeing your baby unhappy is just so so sad , but we made it !!!!! She immediately started sleeping better at night , and today , on day 5 , everything changed for her naps ! I cant believe it is the same baby , and I am just so proud of all of us.

Proud of Paige for pushing through this and learning that sleeping is actually not that bad , and for me for not throwing in the towel (as I wanted to so many times) and for my husband for putting up with all my crying and mood swings this past week !

We are not out of the woods just yet , but our lives have improved so so much , and I honestly recommend this to anyone who is having trouble with their baby’s sleeping habits , its hard , but boy is it worth it !!

Here’s to having our lives back , and having such a happier baby now that she is getting the sleep that she needs to grow and be healthy ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐ŸŽŠ

For those of you who are interested in contacting a sleeping consultant , visit

https://www.goodnightbaby.co.za/

They work all over the world and you can skype with your consultant !

Angelique

Hard Days Are For Growth

Today I am just so emotional and emotionally drained .

My baby girl refused to nap today , she only had 3 20 minute naps in her pram , the WHOLE DAY ! And she is not even 5 months yet , when I put her in her bed she screamed uncontrollably!

Its heartbreaking to say the least , it touches my soul , there is just no other way to explain it , my hands have been sweating the whole day , I’ve cried 3 times already , and then my husband tells me I am uptight today (men right)

But seriously , how intense is this love ? I have always heard that when your child hurts , you hurt , but have never experienced it myself yet , until today that is , everything is just out of wack , I don’t feel like myself , I want to cry all the time !

But I know tomorrow will be better !

Thank goodness I have a blog so that I can offload on all you great listeners ๐Ÿงก

Angelique

Sleep Training Day/Night One …. Kill Me Now !

Okay so you guys read my post on sleep training and getting a sleep consultant about a week ago , and we did , we had our skype meeting with her and she is lovely , I honestly believe that this whole process will work and am quite excited for the end results.

That being said, wow ! What a first night , chaos chaos chaos and then some crying; is basically how I would describe our first night.

In short we had to change the following;

  • Take her dummy away because she associates it with sleep , and wakes up in the middle of the night and needs it to fall back asleep (wow you feel like a bad mom when hearing this, because I was the one that kept forcing the dummy on her when she must sleep and never let her suck her hand or self soothe EVER)
  • Change her bedtime to later – which basically changes her whole routine and you can only imagine how intense that is for a 5 month old
  • Feed her outside her room
  • Have bedtime routine at all naps (read her a story sing, massage) (whatever works for you)

This whole process so far has been so amazing and so helpful and its only day one, in my marriage as well, when there are two parents that are equally involved in raising your baby , things tend to get a bit heated when you disagree on something when it comes to her.

So having a third party tel us how to fix it and how to go about changing things so that Paige can sleep better, really helps, and we don’t fight about anything because it is not our personal opinions that come into play.

Just to put it out there – this sleep training that we are doing does not involve “letting your baby cry it out” or leaving the room while she is crying at any point , but it does involve crying , but we pick her up and comfort her and then put her back down in order to teach her how to fall asleep by herself!

The first day has been intense , and I am sure that we will still have a few obstacles to overcome in the coming week or two , but today I am positive that we will make it through this ๐Ÿ™‚

Angelique

And So It All Starts … ||Marriage

So my husband and I have always eventually ended up on the same page with issues in life , we respect our differences (mostly) and we always try to end up with a compromise that we are both happy with.

HOWEVER , since Paige was born the disagreements started to become more frequent , never about anything other than her , how we put her to bed and get her to sleep , her dummy , her eating , who has to get up , and the list goes on and on !

It is amazing how such a small little human can come and change literally everything in your life , we are going through a period where we are struggling to get her into a sleeping schedule , so my whole day revolves around getting her to nap , and yes you guessed it , most of the time she just laughs at me in her cot ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿคฃ

And yes that means all we talk about is her and how we can do things differently , and off course the moment my husband says anything I feel offended and feel like he is saying I am a bad mother ….. its a vicious cycle !

Thats why we decided on getting a sleeping consultant , that way , its a third party telling us what we are doing wrong and how to fix it , and no one gets offended ๐Ÿคช

Angelique